Do you ever feel such a spiritual high and think, I am getting so much closer to God to then plummet down to the depths of despair when you realize I failed again?
Our Bibles are filled with heroes doing just that.
Sometimes it’s easy to judge them.
Sometimes it’s easy to become them.
All the while, frustration mounts and we wonder, will I ever get it right?
Let’s consider Moses. God called him to help the Israelites escape Pharaoh. In Numbers 20, we see Moses dealing with the people’s hardships, again. Those people tended to get cranky and critical when they couldn’t have what they wanted, when they wanted it.
Reading through their escape, how they handled the Ten Commandments and just pauses in general, I can completely comprehend why they drove Moses nuts!
When Moses struck the rock with the staff in Numbers 20:11, he may have been demonstrating sheer frustration with the people, and maybe not intending to disobey God.
It didn’t matter. In the end, Moses did disobey, and as a consequence, lost the privilege of delivering them into the promised land.
Wow.
We are talking about the man who saw God’s glory pass by him. The man whose face had shown after he had been in God’s presence. The man who had received the Ten Commandments from God’s hand.
He did great things for God.
He heard God’s voice and walked with Him.
And he disobeyed him, and received God’s discipline.
Ouch!
I don’t know about you, but this causes me pause. As I delve deeper into Scripture and grow in my faith, I know I am not perfect. But sometimes, I get frustrated at myself for my propensity to fail more often than I feel I should.
The encouragement I land upon is that Moses was a man God used. Moses wasn’t sure he wanted God to use him, or that God could actually use him, but eventually came around to the idea that God wanted to use him.
I want to grow closer to God.
I regularly do things to help get me to that end. Read Scripture, pray, study the Bible, and attend church.
But the practices will never equal perfection.
Perfection is not the goal.
God knows we are human. He knows we will fail this side of heaven.
God is looking for, is waiting for, us to decide to surrender our hearts.
When we surrender and yield to Him, we are teachable. He can work with us and on us as we wait upon His instruction.
We are also hopeful. Hopeful because it’s no longer up to me and my precise performance. I need to wait patiently on God for His help in all my shortcomings. I just need to ask Him to take charge.
Not any easy task when a human is involved. But He is in the business of changing hearts. He will assist us if we ask.
Will you join me in asking Him for just that?
Prayer: Dear Lord, I want to do right. I want to obey. You know how often I fail. You see the cracks in my armor. Yet, You don’t despair. You know I want to obey and I want to yield to You. Please help me do just that by providing for my need to grow in faith and to trust You. Thank You Lord, in Jesus’ name, amen.